Coach, 40, Weds 16-Year-Old Student, in North Carolina Options

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http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=3305652&page=1

The Hagers are trying to figure out how life went off track for their teenage daughter, Windy.

They envisioned that life for the good student and promising athlete would be filled with dreams of the prom and college, but that all changed this week when Windy, 16, married her high school track coach.

"She was a dream kid," said her mother, Betty Hager. "We'd never have to worry about Windy trying to get by with something."

At South Brunswick High School in North Carolina, Windy's greatest passion was track and field.

"She just always was outside, always running, and her name's Windy — I guess she was predestined to do love to do that," Betty said.

But that passion led her down a troubling path.

Special Attention From Coach
During Windy's freshman year, her 38-year-old track coach, Brenton Wuchae, began taking a more active interest in her, offering to give the 14-year-old rides home from practice.

"He just seemed like a genuine guy, like he was there for the kids," said Windy's father, Dennis Hager.

But the Hagers eventually grew uneasy. Their phone bills showed text messages between Wuchae and Windy as late as 2 a.m.

They also discovered worrying e-mails. In one, Windy wrote to a friend, "I don't care to look at anyone other than him. He is the apple of my eye, I've never felt this way for someone, but I just don't want to lose him because of my parents' power trips."

The Hagers confronted Wuchae.

"He assured me there was nothing like that going on, [and that] they were just friends. His intentions were purely appropriate," Dennis said.

Not satisfied with that answer, the Hagers turned to the school district, which spoke to the coach.

The principal of the high school wrote to the Hagers, "I have seen nothing but a cooperative attitude from the teacher, and to the best of my knowledge, he has not had any contact with Windy since then."

"School officials can't be responsible for what happens the other hours of the day, and I would think the relationship developed much more outside of school," said Brian Shaw, an attorney for the school district.

The Hagers contacted police; they even tried to get a restraining order.

"We've tried everybody. We've been to the law. We've been to the school board," Betty said. "Our family has come and tried to talk to her. We've had people on the phone with her for hours — family, friends. We've been to our pastor asking for guidance. We've been to his pastor."

Meanwhile, the Hagers say Windy withdrew, refusing to speak to them until she asked them to sign a consent form so that she and her coach — a man more than twice her age — could get married.

Although anguished, her weary parents gave in.

"Signing those consent forms was the hardest thing I did in my whole life, but we had to move on, it was going to kill us all," Dennis said.

Monday, Windy and Wuchae married, and he resigned from the school.

But was Windy really old enough to understand her decision? Experts say it's a difficult situation.

"With most teenagers, they're not sure yet who's who and what's what and what should be done," said Henry Paul, author of the book "Is My Teenager OK?" "It's obviously up to the adult figure to set the boundaries."

Windy and her new husband would not comment for this story, but the Hagers realize what they've lost.

"She could have done anything," Betty said. "She could have set the world on fire. She threw it all away."

[FORSAKENR320]

it's a lose/lose situation. i had a situation similar to this with my ex-fiance. my family "put their foot down" and threatened to disown me if i didn't get rid of her. she was underage, but previously married, which means she was considered an adult in texas. i chose her over my family, they disowned me. (keep in mind that they had never met her, knew nothing of her, just that i moved her to lubbock to be with me) in the long run, it would have been better for me to have gotten rid of that whore, yes. but my family never would have been the same. i would have despised them, because to me, they would have "robbed me of my one true love" and i never would have found out that she was worthless and bad for me.

on the other side, my parents are also moderately racist. my little brother has a fiance that is hispanic. they didn't like that at all, but they didn't want to risk disowning their youngest child also. they threatened, and threw a fit for a long time, but eventually they got to know her and they actually like/respect/ and approve of her.

the thing i'm trying to get at is that there are plenty of situations where a parents firm hand is needed to set a child straight. but there are situations where a parent has to sit back and allow the child to learn on their own. love is one of those situations. no one else can ever understand your love for another person. parents should not be allowed to meddle in relationships. how many times have you heard about the troublesome and bitchy mother-in-law?

either this relationship will end in disaster and she'll learn from it, (like mine) or it will succeed and she will actually be happy. (like my brothers) either way, the parents cannot interfere without it ending badly for everyone.