 I took a crap in the shower this morning |
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| I took a crap in the shower this morning |
 Feb 14 2007, 07:35 PM
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#1
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 DEATH TO ....something? Group: Members Posts: 5,618 Joined: 23-February 06 From: Parker, CO Member No.: 55  |
Anyways, I got up this morning and had to crap, so I took one in the usual place (the toilet) ... then I went to hop in the shower, and low and behold, another crap was stealthed behind the one I just took .... so, because I was already wet with the water running and everything, I basically just said "fuck it" and decided to just crap in the shower.
It was actually way cooler than I thought it was gonna be ... I didn't actually squat to take this crap, I just kinda "1/4" squatted just to get it aimed down .... anyways, it was fucking COOL what happened next.... The crap came out with VERY good consistency, and completley all at once, and in a whole peice, landed in the tub with a very nice "thud" sound and made a fucking aboslutley *PERFECT* pile of poo. Like you couldn't have manufactured fake shit with better form than this ... I mean it was PERFECT ... I was completley taken aback by this, because I figured it was gonna be messy, but there was no mess, and it was so consistent it didn't even wash away .... So, completley stunned by this perfect shit I just laid in the shower, I picked it up to put it in the toilet cuz it wasn't washing away, and it was seriously just like Plah-Doh ... I mean it was seriously shit-brown Play-Doh ...like I mean I damn near could have given it to a small child and told them to play with it and they would have. I am still amazed by all of this so I thought I would share. -------------------- I r Ur Gawd!
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Feb 14 2007, 07:37 PM
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#2
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 Why so serious? Group: Global Moderators Posts: 5,286 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Fate, TX Member No.: 4 |
HAHAHAHAHAH
 Oh man, classic Dogmeat! -------------------- |
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Feb 14 2007, 07:38 PM
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#3
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 GORILLA FLUFFER  Group: Agents Posts: 7,711 Joined: 23-February 06 From: lubbock Member No.: 50 |
.....
wow --------------------  QUOTE (Jessica @ May 7 2007, 01:15 PM)  but yeehaw dammit. YEEHAW QUOTE (Dogmeat @ Jun 26 2008, 07:51 PM) ok once upon a time I jacked myself off retarded. Licking anuses, one kindergarten class at a time!! |
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Feb 14 2007, 07:38 PM
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#4
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 Group: Moderators Posts: 1,551 Joined: 19-April 06 From: Lubbock Member No.: 162 |
EEEWWWWWW.........
Dogmeat's feces...... I thought you were already housebroken -------------------- Je suis toute du merde.
....bitches!!!!! |
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Feb 14 2007, 08:26 PM
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#5
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 monogamous gays & stem cells Group: Members Posts: 3,789 Joined: 22-February 06 Member No.: 8 |
i'm laughing so hard right now
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Feb 14 2007, 09:00 PM
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#6
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 Group: Agents Posts: 4,026 Joined: 23-February 06 From: lu-bok Member No.: 41 |
congradulations, you have caused me to giggle.
-------------------- 32-bit whore
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Feb 14 2007, 09:10 PM
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#7
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 N 0 t h i n g Group: Members Posts: 1,449 Joined: 23-February 06 Member No.: 54 |
 You've been banned from the internet. --------------------  QUOTE (jonathan83 @ Nov 16 2007, 09:22 PM) |
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Feb 14 2007, 09:11 PM
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#8
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monogamous gays & stem cells Group: Members Posts: 3,789 Joined: 22-February 06 Member No.: 8 |
i just like how he had to specify the "usual place"
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Feb 14 2007, 09:15 PM
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#9
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 Retired Funk-bringer Group: Moderators Posts: 2,656 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Dallas Member No.: 14 |
note to self: never shower with dogmeat
-------------------- WAIT. I'm not finished.
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Feb 14 2007, 09:57 PM
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#10
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 Group: Moderators Posts: 2,558 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Seoul, South Korea Member No.: 28 |
yes, i just realized i actually love dogmeat.
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Feb 14 2007, 10:54 PM
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#11
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 FFFFFFFUCKKKKKKKKKKKK Group: Members Posts: 1,673 Joined: 22-February 06 Member No.: 11 |
what in the FUCK
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Feb 14 2007, 10:54 PM
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#12
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I was raised on the dairy, BITCH! Group: Members Posts: 3,080 Joined: 23-February 06 From: Cedar Park Member No.: 49 |
gold
-------------------- "Ah, y'know it's funny, these people they go to sleep, they think everything's fine, everything's good. They wake up the next day and they're on fire."
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Feb 14 2007, 11:17 PM
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#13
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 Group: Admin Posts: 3,403 Joined: 23-February 06 From: PDX/TXL Member No.: 35 |
Wow, I didn't even need pictures to vomit a little in my mouth...
-------------------- "There is a level of cowardice lower than that of the conformist: that of the fashionable non-conformist." |
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Feb 14 2007, 11:39 PM
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#14
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 New son Donovan Charles Mummert born July 17, 2008 Group: Members Posts: 8,635 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Port Wentworth, GA Member No.: 15 |
neat!
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Feb 15 2007, 01:23 AM
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#15
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monogamous gays & stem cells Group: Members Posts: 3,789 Joined: 22-February 06 Member No.: 8 |
dogmeat needs to go on that infomercial where they just talk about poop the whole time
the one with the greasy ponytail scumbag guy named klee irwin |
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Feb 15 2007, 02:44 AM
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#16
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 Oh baby bring me down Group: Agents Posts: 4,115 Joined: 23-February 06 From: Way out yonder Member No.: 68 |
Classy like Plastic Silverware!
-------------------- Southern Rock, beer and bears!
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Feb 15 2007, 04:05 AM
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#17
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Group: Members Posts: 1,566 Joined: 23-February 06 From: Houston, TX Member No.: 66 |
You're exactly the kinda guy I could take home to mom.
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Feb 15 2007, 08:37 AM
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#18
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Group: Moderators Posts: 1,551 Joined: 19-April 06 From: Lubbock Member No.: 162 |
on a semi-related note, I think I might be constipated, but I'm not sure if it's this thread or my high-fiber diet that's to blame. Maybe both....
-------------------- Je suis toute du merde.
....bitches!!!!! |
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Feb 15 2007, 09:13 AM
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#19
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 Group: Members Posts: 1,761 Joined: 23-February 06 From: Lubbock/Dubai Member No.: 57 |
i gotta say that made me laugh....what was worse is that you actually picked it up and explained the consistancy
-------------------- bored...so i did this
http://beerlist.wetpaint.com/ |
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Feb 15 2007, 09:38 AM
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#20
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 Group: Members Posts: 1,795 Joined: 29-September 06 Member No.: 327 |
charming.
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Feb 15 2007, 09:42 AM
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#21
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New son Donovan Charles Mummert born July 17, 2008 Group: Members Posts: 8,635 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Port Wentworth, GA Member No.: 15 |
I hope to god this is just another one of his silly stories that he made up in his head
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Feb 15 2007, 09:49 AM
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#22
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Group: Admin Posts: 6,906 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Austin Member No.: 9 |
...
... 
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Feb 15 2007, 10:07 AM
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#23
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 Group: Moderators Posts: 2,499 Joined: 23-February 06 From: El Paso Texas Member No.: 32 |
un-fucking-believable
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Feb 15 2007, 10:23 AM
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#24
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 Do they ignore parts of reality? Group: Moderators Posts: 2,935 Joined: 23-February 06 From: South Overton!!! Member No.: 46 |
that is disgusting
On that note, I am going to take a shit This post has been edited by Dr. Gonzo: Feb 15 2007, 10:24 AM -------------------- A psychotic world we live in. The madmen are in power. How long have we known this? Faced this? And--how many of us do know it? Perhaps if you know you are insane then you are not insane. Or you are becoming sane, finally. Waking up. I suppose only a few are aware of all this. Isolated persons here and there. But the broad masses... what do they think? All these hundreds of thousands in this city, here. Do they imagine that they live in a sane world? Or do they guess, glimpse, the truth...?
-Philip K. Dick |
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Feb 15 2007, 10:35 AM
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#25
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Group: Moderators Posts: 1,551 Joined: 19-April 06 From: Lubbock Member No.: 162 |
QUOTE (Dr. Gonzo @ Feb 15 2007, 10:23 AM) that is disgusting On that note, I am going to take a shit In high school,I knew 5 guys who would go, not everyday, but more than once, to the bathroom and "take a slam as a team." I found this highly disturbing because I personally enjoy privacy during that activity. So, how about we throw a techsans poo party, since everyone seems to like poop. We'll agree to all go simultaneously in our respective toilets (or showers) and then we can post about what a relieving, unique experience it was. sometimes I disturb myself. 
-------------------- Je suis toute du merde.
....bitches!!!!! |
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Feb 15 2007, 10:36 AM
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#26
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New son Donovan Charles Mummert born July 17, 2008 Group: Members Posts: 8,635 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Port Wentworth, GA Member No.: 15 |
thats disgusting. count me out
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Feb 15 2007, 10:36 AM
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#27
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Group: Admin Posts: 6,906 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Austin Member No.: 9 |
*twitch*
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Feb 15 2007, 10:40 AM
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#28
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Group: Moderators Posts: 1,551 Joined: 19-April 06 From: Lubbock Member No.: 162 |
the previous post was 73% sarcasm guaranteed. note the line: since everyone seems to like poop.
-------------------- Je suis toute du merde.
....bitches!!!!! |
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Feb 15 2007, 02:46 PM
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#29
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I was raised on the dairy, BITCH! Group: Members Posts: 3,080 Joined: 23-February 06 From: Cedar Park Member No.: 49 |
QUOTE (griseyeux @ Feb 15 2007, 10:35 AM) In high school,I knew 5 guys who would go, not everyday, but more than once, to the bathroom and "take a slam as a team." I found this highly disturbing because I personally enjoy privacy during that activity. So, how about we throw a techsans poo party, since everyone seems to like poop. We'll agree to all go simultaneously in our respective toilets (or showers) and then we can post about what a relieving, unique experience it was. sometimes I disturb myself. I'LL BRING THE CHIPS -------------------- "Ah, y'know it's funny, these people they go to sleep, they think everything's fine, everything's good. They wake up the next day and they're on fire."
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Feb 15 2007, 02:51 PM
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#30
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Group: Moderators Posts: 1,551 Joined: 19-April 06 From: Lubbock Member No.: 162 |
QUOTE (pysex @ Feb 15 2007, 02:46 PM) I'LL BRING THE CHIPS ooh!! can they be black pepper chips? -------------------- Je suis toute du merde.
....bitches!!!!! |
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Feb 15 2007, 03:09 PM
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#31
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FFFFFFFUCKKKKKKKKKKKK Group: Members Posts: 1,673 Joined: 22-February 06 Member No.: 11 |
Voting fake
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Feb 15 2007, 05:16 PM
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#32
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DEATH TO ....something? Group: Members Posts: 5,618 Joined: 23-February 06 From: Parker, CO Member No.: 55 |
QUOTE (Seussninja @ Feb 15 2007, 03:09 PM) Voting fake
-------------------- I r Ur Gawd!
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Feb 16 2007, 01:44 AM
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#33
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Group: Moderators Posts: 2,558 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Seoul, South Korea Member No.: 28 |
QUOTE (griseyeux @ Feb 15 2007, 10:35 AM) In high school,I knew 5 guys who would go, not everyday, but more than once, to the bathroom and "take a slam as a team." was one of them josh myers? -------------------- |
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Feb 16 2007, 10:23 AM
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#34
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Group: Moderators Posts: 1,551 Joined: 19-April 06 From: Lubbock Member No.: 162 |
QUOTE (jonathan83 @ Feb 16 2007, 01:44 AM) was one of them josh myers? no, but it's interesting that you ask that.....now i am curious about josh myers. One of them was Alex Eagle, though. -------------------- Je suis toute du merde.
....bitches!!!!! |
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Feb 16 2007, 04:53 PM
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#35
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CHEE CHEE Group: Members Posts: 5,026 Joined: 23-February 06 From: trapped in the hoezone layer Member No.: 39 |
at track and cross country meets of whatever amplitiude and importance, after a little bit of a warm up ~35minutes before your first event, youd force yourself to take a poopy. i remember "learning" this technique early on and thinking "oh yeah that would make sense why havent i always been doing that". i didnt learn it in any hand holding relay team way though. but i lost that special ability. pooping is highly positively correlated with athleticism
-------------------- Little monkeys making money
Naked monkey looking funny Mighty males are strong and free Female monkey, not so lucky Rocking monkeys, funky monkeys Monkeys sticking other monkeys Monkeys wrong or monkeys right Mostly flexing monkey might |
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Feb 16 2007, 05:06 PM
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#36
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Group: Moderators Posts: 1,551 Joined: 19-April 06 From: Lubbock Member No.: 162 |
that's great.
-------------------- Je suis toute du merde.
....bitches!!!!! |
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Feb 16 2007, 05:07 PM
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#37
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CHEE CHEE Group: Members Posts: 5,026 Joined: 23-February 06 From: trapped in the hoezone layer Member No.: 39 |
therefore, that team poop story of yours that was so great makes sense
-------------------- Little monkeys making money
Naked monkey looking funny Mighty males are strong and free Female monkey, not so lucky Rocking monkeys, funky monkeys Monkeys sticking other monkeys Monkeys wrong or monkeys right Mostly flexing monkey might |
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