 my brush with death |
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| my brush with death |
 Sep 4 2008, 01:34 PM
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#1
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 Group: Members Posts: 5,275 Joined: 22-February 06 Member No.: 2  |
Something incredible happened to me today. I had just started my car when the whole engine suddenly collapsed through itself in six seconds, leaving nothing but a pile of demolished and partially molten steel on the road.
Not long ago I would have thought this an odd event, but thanks to recent breakthroughs in science I now know what must have happened. The burning hydrocarbons (in this case, gasoline) in the cylinders must have caused "Thermal Expansion" to occur. This in turn caused all of the steel components underneath the cylinders to fail simultaneously, enabling the engine to fall through itself. The weight of the engine itself probably assisted collapse. Obviously I was shaken. To calm myself down, I went indoors to make a cup of coffee. I lit the gas stove, and put my kettle on to boil. Big mistake. Thermal Expansion struck again. The kettle collapsed right through itself, spilling boiling water everywhere. And then the goddam stove collapsed through itself too. I'd forgotten it was only made of steel. Faced with unforeseeable temperatures, one critical, load-bearing part must have given way. This is a serious problem. I'd suggest encasing steel in something fireproof, like concrete or asbestos, but I'm not sure that will work. Perhaps steel items like kettles, stoves, and engines could be reinforced to support their own weight? Perhaps expansion joints could be incorporated, like in buildings? I don't know. |
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Sep 4 2008, 01:37 PM
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#2
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 Why so serious? Group: Global Moderators Posts: 5,286 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Fate, TX Member No.: 4 |
wait....
this all really happened to you today? -------------------- |
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Sep 4 2008, 01:57 PM
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#3
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Group: Admin Posts: 6,906 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Austin Member No.: 9 |
It's a reference to the "9/11 was an inside job" conspiracies.
http://forum.prisonplanet.com/index.php?ac...e;topic=56970.0 -------------------- |
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Sep 4 2008, 02:00 PM
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#4
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Group: Members Posts: 5,275 Joined: 22-February 06 Member No.: 2 |
win
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Sep 4 2008, 02:12 PM
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#5
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Group: Admin Posts: 6,906 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Austin Member No.: 9 |
Not really.
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Sep 4 2008, 02:14 PM
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#6
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Group: Members Posts: 5,275 Joined: 22-February 06 Member No.: 2 |
i guess you don't want your cookie then, i'm eating it
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Sep 4 2008, 02:45 PM
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#7
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Why so serious? Group: Global Moderators Posts: 5,286 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Fate, TX Member No.: 4 |
ah.
*shrug* -------------------- |
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Sep 4 2008, 03:14 PM
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#8
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Group: Admin Posts: 6,906 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Austin Member No.: 9 |
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Sep 4 2008, 03:14 PM
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#9
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 Group: Members Posts: 10,620 Joined: 23-February 06 From: Houston, TX Member No.: 48 |
The American people want their $0.55 back
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Sep 4 2008, 03:16 PM
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#10
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Group: Admin Posts: 6,906 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Austin Member No.: 9 |
QUOTE (impala454 @ Sep 4 2008, 04:14 PM)  The American people want their $0.55 back 
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Sep 4 2008, 03:30 PM
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#11
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Group: Members Posts: 10,620 Joined: 23-February 06 From: Houston, TX Member No.: 48 |
Ok make it $0.67
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Sep 4 2008, 03:41 PM
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#12
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Why so serious? Group: Global Moderators Posts: 5,286 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Fate, TX Member No.: 4 |
QUOTE (impala454 @ Sep 4 2008, 04:30 PM) Ok make it $0.67 But, freedom costs a buck-0-five... 
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Sep 4 2008, 05:42 PM
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#13
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 GORILLA FLUFFER  Group: Agents Posts: 7,711 Joined: 23-February 06 From: lubbock Member No.: 50 |
--------------------  QUOTE (Jessica @ May 7 2007, 01:15 PM) but yeehaw dammit. YEEHAW QUOTE (Dogmeat @ Jun 26 2008, 07:51 PM) ok once upon a time I jacked myself off retarded. Licking anuses, one kindergarten class at a time!! |
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Sep 5 2008, 04:14 PM
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#14
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 New son Donovan Charles Mummert born July 17, 2008 Group: Members Posts: 8,635 Joined: 22-February 06 From: Port Wentworth, GA Member No.: 15 |
QUOTE (FORSAKENR320 @ Sep 4 2008, 06:42 PM) |
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Sep 5 2008, 06:09 PM
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#15
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I was raised on the dairy, BITCH! Group: Members Posts: 3,080 Joined: 23-February 06 From: Cedar Park Member No.: 49 |
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
-------------------- "Ah, y'know it's funny, these people they go to sleep, they think everything's fine, everything's good. They wake up the next day and they're on fire."
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